nothing in this world is permanent. except for change.

have this journey with me, lets grow together.

Monday, May 10, 2010


Saturday, May 06 (age 16)

~ I've been recently wondering how life for me is very similar with the stage.
~ In a stage, every single performance is special, magical, excellent, grandeur.
~ There's a huge audience that's watching for you, full house, waiting for you to do your best, asking you to effortlessly give you an applause after a great performance.
~ Although, before every performance, there's always the worry, heart pumping fast, nervous of what's going to happen out there.
~ But once you're in that stage, a different feeling comes in. Lightness, Like your heart is telling you that you'd be just fine, and nothing wrong is going to happen, believe in yourself and you'll do great. Then when you go out there in that special stage where it seems that you become a different person.
~ Only to find out that that person is not entirely not you. But a part of you. It could even be the real you. Free to express what you feel and free to be that person you'd want to be.
~ It may also be like a trapeze, you fly, you'll soar and when you fall a partner will come to you, help you stand up, and without any hesitations both of you begins to start yet a better and beautiful performance.
~ A different kind of performance that relates you and your audience, a bond that can't be easily explained.
~ In life, you try to be the best performer of your own stage.
~ Every time your dreams and goals comes true, every single fulfillment that you have been able to achieve no matter how simple it is, you're there standing up with so much pride and vigor hearing your own heart applause for what you've achieved.
~ Whenever you try to take risks, there may be uncertainties. But then you realize that through it all, after all the things you've been through, no matter how long it could take there’s always way out of everything. That you can improvise something up so that you won't be able to miss a line, or a point in your life.
~ You just have to follow your heart and believe in yourself.
~ Sometimes you'll fail, you'll fall down, it could even be hard but then a friend, family, or someone really special will help you through it and help you to stand up and tell you that there's always a second chance. Prove yourself that you've become better and you're ready to suck it all up.
~ Our lives have its share of ups and downs. But the best thing in our lives is to give out the perfect performance.
~ The audience of our lives are people who loves us the most, our inspiration.
~ Always remember to give your best performance, like it is the last performance of our lives. Live your everyday life like it was your last day here on Earth.
~ That no matter how much drama or tragedy, no matter how much fantasy or comedy your life is, it still is an adventure; a stage for you to sketch, to write the lines of which ever you want to say or however you'd want to people tell what your life is about and what you have become.
~ Our lives is similar to that stage.
~ This is how life special, magical, excellent, grandeur.

Thursday, May 6, 2010


Thursday, March 30 (age 16)

~ I'm on to something new.
~ I just realized, that molding myself to become a better person is better than looking for the old ‘me’ whom I lost a thousand years ago.
~ Yes, I changed. But at least I know that I changed better than the than the ‘me’ I was looking for.
~ Now I painting a new portrait of myself from the colors of my life.
~ I keep on learning which made me the person whom I am now. Its a whole new me.
~ I'm more comfortable with myself, understand myself more and accept who I am now and what I want to be.
~ I didn't entirely gave my old self up. Some of the hold habits and good traits are still here.
~ Now I'm up for more new challenges in life.
~ I tell myself that a lot of times life leads us to different struggles, but have you ever asked yourself that without these struggles we won’t be able to learn how to become a better person? A better you?
~ Back then I was trying to choose between the decisions of both my heart and my mind. But then I realized that choosing between my heart and mind just makes things more complicated.
~ I suddenly realized that if I were to choose myself and just decide to love myself more rather than just confuse my self over contradicting mental and emotional decisions, I may be able to free myself out of uncertainty and despair.
~ That I can live my life the way I wanted to with both happiness and peace of mind.
~ Then I came up with these questions: Why search if you haven’t learned anything from your journey? And what’s the use of knowledge if you don’t know the true meaning of your life?
~ They're not that hard to answer...
~ Learning is better than searching, and lessons are better than knowledge.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Letting go

Saturday, February 18 (age 16)

~ ”How can I forget the person I love?”
~ That’s the question that's always have been recently pooping out form some people that I know.
~ In my opinion, we can never ‘forget’ the person we loved even though they have caused us so much pain.
~ Forgetting is not the answer. That person also became a part of your memories, your life. We can’t give up a piece of that memory. Even if it is so painful, we could never forget.
~ All we have to do is to let that love fade away. It takes time yes, but once it fades you’ll feel that a heavy burden is lifted off you.
~ Just live normally. Continue with your own life. It’s not the end of your life.
~ Always look at the bright side. Think that maybe it didn’t work because he/she is not the one for you.
~ Cry if you want to, but make sure that once you cried for that person you should let all those tears out.
~ One friend of mine said "Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one so that when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift."
~ Its like the trick to learn how to look for the right one and making it sure that we made the right choice.
~ Open your heart for another person.
~ Another opportunity of falling in love. Always say to yourself that if a relationship didn't work out and if you're still young, there's still 10 to 20 years of your life to find that special person.
~ No time is wasted because after each break up you'll learn something more about yourself to which kind of person you'd want to end up with and be able avoid committing mistakes that you've done before.
~ Letting go is not just letting go of that person you loved or still love, its also setting yourself free from all the pain and agony that your heart keeps throwing on you.
~ Moving on is hard.
~ But loving another one is whole new experience.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010


Monday, January 23 (age 16)

~ There are things that I just wanted to take care on my own…..
~ I decided to solve my own problems and see the outcome of whatever choice that I was able to make.
~ Its easier that way. No people to worry about me, no person will judge and no more reasons for me to say.
~ I just want to make sure that I could take things on my own and tell to myself that even though life has a lot of hard lessons and struggles, I could stand up for myself and say “Hey! Life’s not bad after all.
~ That’s what I wanted to believe.
~ There are things I want to learn, things that I shouldn’t forget, and meet people that would remember me for who I am.
~ I'd like to be able to let all my emotions out without hurting anyone I love.
~ That’s why I decided to take things on my own without the help of my friends or family.
~ Some people think that I’m a person full of laughter, happiness, smiles...
~ But they’re not entirely right.
~ I’m just wearing a mask just to make them think that I’m fine, that I’m okay.
~ I grew up depending only on my own without people telling me what to do or what to say. That there's like a big wall that's containing me to prevent me from just being myself.
~ Fortunately, I didn't end up like those other kids who become rebels and just do what they want to do with their lives and abuse themselves from influences that could hurt themselves and the people around them.
~ I grew up learning that being bad is bad from my lola. When she left me to take care of my younger sibling who's living abroad for my mom, I was just 14. That's where I started to leap from my age and think like a different person.
~ As years pass, I was I able to become more and more independent.
~ Although I did, I'm note prone to create mistakes. There's still so much uncertainty with me, so much insecurities. That made me reticent, that part of me became invisible which at the same time made disgusted about myself.
~ At first I believed that being who I want to be is sometimes the wrong thing to do.
~ Maybe that’s why at the first place I forgot who I really am, not knowing of what I have become and that I’ve already lost a big part of me.
~ I think I should also search the other side of me. The real me.
~ I believe I should start to accept myself so that people would be able to understand and accept me too.

Sunday, May 2, 2010


Sunday, December 25 (age 16)

~ Merry Christmas!
~ I’m starting to feel quite lately, not just because its Christmas but maybe because I starting to understand myself more.
~ Happy because its been quite some time that I was able to relax and just take everything easily.
~ This could be a good start for the upcoming new year.

~ I could feel something good will happen this year. (watch out for this one...)

~ I need a fresh start. Feeling bad about yourself wouldn’t help you a lot. That’s something I'm starting to learn now.
~ I just need to be happy for myself that’s all.
~ I don't want to even think or talk about someone. He’ll come, I know he will. I just have to be patient.
~ What’s more important now is that I feel relived and happy.

Saturday, May 1, 2010


Saturday, November 19 (age 16)

~ Why does almost all of the people about think these days is nothing more than just sex?... Don't you just hate it?
~ Love will find its way to you as some people say. 50% of them think they are looking for love but they unconsciously think of nothing but their own version of fun.
~ I don’t want to go out there looking for someone just to say that I'm in search for love. Doesn't make it more meaningful if you just force it out to you.
~ I'm the type of person who's very exclusive, I'd really want to get to know the person really well before deciding if he's the right person for me.
~ And yes, because I’m too scared to get hurt. I don't think I can handle the pain.
~ Although I'm used to being rejected by people I love as I grew up, It'd still be hard to let go of a person you invested so much feelings to.
~ When it comes to love, its really inevitable for me to just give. That's the scary part.
~ I can’t beg for a person to love me back or to love me again. I'm too coward to do so. I don't have that enough strength since its been like that ever since I was a child.
~ Its so easy for me to let go, especially if I realize that feelings are starting to falter... Even if i still love that person.
~ It might not be normal for a person to say but its true. I want that person to be happy up to the last day that we would be together.
~ But moving on is not the best thing that I can do. It'll be a long process if I may say.
~ I hope people will realize that love is not like a hide and go seek game.
~ Love is not a game. It’s a commitment.
~ Love is not all about sex. Its all about loving someone more than anyone else.
~ Love is not an affection. It’s more than adoration.
~ Love is not all about being happy. It could also be the reason why a lot of people gets hurt.
~ Love could be very ironic. I've seen a lot of failed relationships, and its quite hard to see myself in that situation.
~ I’m not yet ready to face it. Fortunately I can understand it.

When Boy meets Boy Book 2: Sticky & Sweet!

LOVE is definitely stickier and sweeter the second time around!

After experiencing another major heart break, Adam is now more determined to focus on his career and nothing else. He now has his own advice column in a major magazine. Things are looking up for him when he meets ambitious, vibrant, and sexy Brandon. Things started heating up between them until people from his past came knocking back on his doorsteps.

Join Adam and the wacky set of people in his life in the second book of When Boy meets Boy.

COMING MAY 10 2010